Not meant to be

Picture : Pinterest

I put my hand on the couch between us, waiting for you to sluggishly brush your hand against mine, for me to turn beetroot by the intentions of your lazy contagious smile. I look over to you, too engrossed in the story on screen than in our own colorless ballad, that I could feel you slipping away form our delightful ditty and that I have ceased to be your only felicity. 

And it was a sore awakening that our hearts no longer skip beats together and that time has had its way even in our ‘come what may’. 

People give up when the lullaby ends. And so many unfulfilled dreams frizzle out. When the sparks die out, stories break off, feelings ebb away and the memories made often remain off the beaten path. And its tragic how so many ‘happily ever after’s come down to this. 

Star Gazers.

Why did i connect with this person so much? I could never figure. 
But in the wintry nights, we’d sit in the terrace in our worn out cozy pullovers, sneaking out at midnight just to gaze at the stars and dream out loud with eyes wide open. We’d exchange our playlists and listen to each others favourite tunes and love them as much, as the cold wind chilled our bones. I could see his fears out in the dark. I could feel his pain of always being second guessed. I could contemplate his insecurities in letting in, his struggles in holding on and his torment in letting go. And when I’d look into his eyes,  I could see all the broken dreams that once lit them as clear as the sky above us. I could feel his heartaches and serendipity all at once. His distraughted yet innocent gaze filled me with amenity and that, in some mystical way took the edge off my agitated self, everytime. Like I had known him all my life. Like he was familiar with all the different colors my heart beaten for. 
Those were the nights I realized how you always need such souls whose broken pieces look like yours. You don’t have to romanticize it. Really. You don’t have to anything it. You just have to find them and once you do, you’re sorted for life. 

Lost Love? 

​” Do you love her? ” she asked. And deep down she knew her heart would sink at his reply. 

” Yes ” he said.

And the way she faked a smile told him maybe…maybe he was wrong thinking he had hurt her the most when he abandoned her. 

He was contrite. He didn’t want to do what he had been doing all his life, put her through more pain. 

” I miss you” he said, in a failed attempt to make her smile.
She didn’t reply. She didn’t even look at him. She kept her gaze fixed in the tiny water droplets from the sky kissing the glass window pane of the tiny cafe that felt cozy in the chilly December morning.

He remembered how ecstatic she had once been, when it had all started, five years back. When everything he did only made her smile. She used to be such a baby, not a touch of grodiness in her shipshape soul. 

He stole a glimpse of her.
Yes. She was still beautiful. But now, she’s more of a broken beauty. And it did kill him knowing he’s the reason for this turnover. 

” Look at me ”
He could see her pulling in the pool of tears that blurred her vision. 

She finally looked at him in the eyes, pulling herself together, she said, ” Look, just go!  Go to her and live happily ever after. I don’t care. Do you get that? I don’t care for you at all. ”
She stormed out of the tiny cafe door, wondering if this is how not caring felt like. She walked in the pouring rain, letting the unwelcomed tears flow. 

There were hardly a few people on the street. On any other day, she wouldn’t even call someone out loud in public. But today was different. Today, she didn’t care. She just had to let it all out, do what she wanted to do since her eyes met his in that tiny coffee shop, in a city, miles away from home. 
She stood in a corner, where rain could still reach her. She put her hands on her face and cryed. And when she opened her eyes again, he was there, right in front of her, all drenched in rain. The water, dripped from his already messed hair. She didn’t have to differ the tears from the raindrops to know he had been crying too.
Without wasting another moment he grabbed her, wrapped his arms around her waist, pulled her towards him and planted his lips on hers and kissed her. 

And that moment was kind of a time travelling to “their” days. 

She kissed him back, with all that she had. But she knew she couldn’t change her mind. She had to leave. And only haven knew how bad she wished for the clock to stop ticking.
She savaged the feeling of his lips on hers, for the very last time, pulled back and looked him in the eyes. 
” I love you ”

Then she ran away.

He wanted to stop her from running away and make her run to him instead. He wanted to tell her the same. But he was too messed up to follow her again and so he let her go. 
The two lovers never crossed each others paths again, ever. 

P. S-not a fan of happy endings. 

Let me know how it was. Feedbacks and follows are always welcome.

Also, I’m thinking of posting long stories as a series. Please let me know how the idea is. I won’t go ahead without your approval.

Grim Reaper.

​I’ve been told about this day by many, solely for the purpose of making it cogent. I’ve been divulged of this predicament in details…. It’s doings and dealings and aftermath and fallout. Everything I would endure and everything I should. I’ve been warned since long about this baleful epoch. 

Image source : Pinterest 
Yet, I sit here, beside you, rapting how these little seconds,  as they’re passing by, are taking away with them, my fool’s Paradise, making me realise how no amount of forewarning could have smoothened my way through this torment. 

I sit here beside you and watch the vital spark parting ways with you, ebbing the colors out of your cogenial soul reprehending my believe in miracles. 

I sit here beside you holding your cold pale hands in mine as you mumble something beyond comprehension apprising of the pain beyond your wildest dreams. Engrossing in the way you’re about to leave us, I realised how little time I got to spend with you. Knowing all of your deluxe personality in just sixteen years was like snowball’s chance in hell. 

So I sit here helplessly as the gory cancer throttled the life out of your body,  little at a time, worsening the suffering and making me question the ways of the universe and how it can ever, let alone make a man of no harm go through unjust suffering but also make his daughter watch?!! 

P. S. – I’m sorry,  I wasn’t able to post for so long. Things are hard over here.  I started writing this piece long ago but could only complete it after I was assured that my Father, now, is free of pain. 

Quotes Challenge

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Hi,
I would like to thank all my friends (followers) for being in touch with me! I’m very new to blogging and you people always have been very supportive.
I was nominated for the quotes challenge and i thank https://www.fabwritings.wordpress.com/ for that with all my heart. I was humbled.

Also, i would like to keep this challenge to day one as i don’t know many people here to nominate further.
So, i’ve always been the kind of person who loved words and was mesmerized by such deep meanings behind a group of a few letters. So yes, choosing favourite was difficult as much as it would be if you ask me my favourite book or a mother her favourite child. But anyway, i have managed to figure out three quotes i really really love. I hope you enjoy them and i hope they inspire you.

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1. “The Dream Is Real”
Never, never let anybody crush your dreams, drouse your passion, and make you feel stupid for dreaming. You CAN do anything (i repeat : anything) you dream of. All you have to do is believe you can.

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2. “Some Days… You Have To Just Put On The Hat To Remind Them Who They Are Dealing With”
Being good in a world this cruel can be harmful at times. You should be good to others but not at the expense of yourself. At times, you need to make them know that they’re far too weak to take you for granted.

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3. “A rose can never be asunflower,  and a sunflower can never be a rose. All flowers are beautiful in their own way and that’s like women too”
People need to know this and people need to understand this and people need to accept this. Once they do, the world would be a far better place to live in.

Thank you so much.

Rules for the 3 days quote Challenge :
1. Thank the blogger who nominated you.
2. Post 1-3 quotes each day for 3 consecutive days.
3. Nominate three bloggers each day.
Now, the MOST difficult part comes, I must nominate three bloggers. (Sorry if I don’t nominate you…😥 but still, there are two days left, leave a comment if you like to get nominated and I’ll try my best!)
So, let’s do this. I would like to nominate :
1. https://myhappycornerblog.wordpress.com/
You should check her blog out for some awesome posts!
2. https://authormbeyer.wordperss.com/
Catch a Falling Star. The name itself is enough to set the bar high. *wink*
3. https://yannamarrie.wordpress.com/
She has some really rebelling ideas. Very inspiring, i must say.

Truth.

The truth is, i am still hurting and that i have failed to cease this pain, or at any attepmt to forget you or get you out of my system. The truth is, i still care. And the truth is i feel miserable without you.

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So,  my love, here i am, scribbling my diary pages to make you sound beautiful.

Hello people. I hope you enjoy my write ups. Feedbacks are always welcome. Do follow for more. Thank you.